Wednesday, December 16, 2015


Hi everyone!  Students often ask me about the cultural differences between friendship and acquaintance in America and how to know when someone really wants to be your friend.    I talk about it in this video but let expand on it a little.

First off, in this video I talk about a lunch invite.   Now, being asked to go downstairs to the franchised sandwich shop, like Cosi or Panera to get the office order for lunch--that's not an indicator that someone wants to be your friend.   However, if they invite you personally to lunch at an actual restaurant--as opposed to a franchise or a chain, and its going to be you and a couple of other guys or gals--this is an indicator that they want to start to make friends.

You see the difference?  A chain food place or a franchise--that's not really a "lunch invite".  A lunch invite is when you *personally* are invited to grab a bite at a diner or a restaurant.   Now if someone wants to invite you *personally* and a couple of other people to a higher end chain or restaurant--say like a Ruth's Chris Steakhouse or somewhere on that level--or a  Benihana or what have you--that *is* an indicator that they want to be real friends, or start to be real friends.

It has to do with two things: One, how personal or personalized is the invitation--is it to you personally and directly and no one else, and two how nice is the place where you're going?   Most professional Americans, quite frankly, tend to consider places like Cosi and Panera and places like that to be "junk" food.    Ruth's Chris Steakhouse or a similar place, or a Benihana or an independently owned diner is not junk food...you see?

Hey, if you have other questions on this topic or any other topic of American culture, corporate culture, or conversational culture, give me a call at (732) 807-5424, or hit me up on Skype at david.berlin.esl.   Also check out my American Idiom of the Day Twitter Feed or check out my ESL and Accent Reduction Training Website for details about ESL and accent reduction lessons and how you can get your FREE phone consult and book a first lesson.  All right?  Would love to hear from you.